Disclaimer: These works are the product of an immature
mind and thus may not be suitable for other
immature minds. Discretion may be needed while reading.
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[ Folio 6 ] [ Folio 7 ] [ Folio 8 ] [ Folio 9 ]

The Split, subtitled: Michelle Doesn't Live Here Anymore

• tombstone
• tombstone sequel
• i GROK it
• Begging for Closure

She Wanted this on our Tombstone

We stole each other’s hearts
And took each other’s freedom
But the holes are filled with Love

From early 1995, this used to be one of Michelle's favorites. Obviously the sentiment was forgotten
*return to top*

Ours 13

That is yours, This mine
Residue of thirteen years
What happened to Ours?

2 Nov 2005. I guess this is the sequel to the Us/Tombstone haiku
*return to top*

Groking the split

I live in a small world and she needs to live in a big one.

They are really the same world but in my version you make small subtle movements. Peace comes from a canoe in the middle of a lake, building things with your hands, and hammocks and porch swings. There are rules and set behaviors. You dress up for Mardi Gras and you dress down for work. It’s mostly black and white. You die trying to keep your word and promises. And because of that I will always think she was wrong to give up and leave.

But in her world there is a wide-open space that must be filled by collecting attention around you and spinning it until it’s a whirling dervish of activity. Movements are big and that’s what brings happiness. And that happiness is more important than any vow or self-sacrifice. I can visit that world but I can’t live in it.

17 Nov 2005, semi-poetic words I found while trying to understand the end of my marriage
*return to top*

Begging for Closure

dont freak out
i only want what i want
at least i did not ask you
to stay and love me back

you are gone
and i cant stop it
it doesnt matter to where you fly

i used to love you
i used to need you
now i can only grieve for you

but wish i could have you
just long enough to say goodbye

i dont want pain
i would not keep you
i would not ask you
to stay and love again

i will always know her
mother of my children
but i will always wonder
who you were

can you tell me
will you tell me
who did you become
or were you ever there

10 Nov 2005, even though only you can really give yourself closure -epl
*return to top*

For Michelle...

Journal of a Discovery

like a desert wanderer weary from mirages
i was afraid to kiss you
afraid you weren't real
but after feeling the warmth of your lips
i knew i was to be with you

just as that same weary traveler
must slip his feet into the clear pool of an oasis
lay back and bury his fingers in the beach sand
relishing in the difference between these grains
and those of the nameless dunes he has just crossed

i soon knew i had found my homeland
and would forever more live within (the country of) your love

-An old Christmas gift for Michelle. Doesn't seem to mean much anymore. Dec. 20, '95
*return to top*

Mediocre or mediaokra - you be the judge.
[ Folio 1 ] [ Folio 2 ] [ Folio 3 ] [ Folio 4 ]
[ Folio 5 ] [ Folio 6 ] [ Folio 7 ] [ Folio 8 ] [ Folio 9 ]